August 4, 2007

That’s all that she did say…

Posted in Uncategorized at 1:27 am by cassandra

fallen

After a long long time again I have nothing to post…to tell you frankly many a times I lack ideas….you can also say that most of the time I am short of ideas…and when I go through these phases…I get a little…don’t know what…

Few days’ back I had a chat with a girl…in my dreamland…the girl whom I know for a long time…(of course in my vision)…completely injured and devastated by life’s ruthlessness…she was flaming…
Her body smelt of salt…pungent odor of rotten flower…that even yellow leaves fear to touch….
‘Filth’ is what they call her…the streetwise suave humans…the life she has been living for long is nothing but pestilence…
But I loved her…I knew I did…and had a long exchange of ideas over existence…there I found what she wants to say…a morbid discourse of life…

” Life has so little to give…so less to perform…overseer of catastrophe…observes in proposition…
I know what my position is…pest of a worst species…what humans fear to see…but tramples with militancy…
But…I fight with all I have…the strength that I hoard…love is what I brawl for…in the sea without a shore…
Mourning for years …for the things…I crave for long…thought I would achieve it one day…
Laugh those gentlemen…up from the porch…In a cynical mode…(as if) I was dreaming on a sunny day…
Days passed by and I realized…Slavery…that might work…that is what I was made for…
But…the smell…that rotten smell…made their house a vinegary dump…
I thought I was not a human being…feminine exhibition was a luxury…men harked for the beauty that’s real…not the sordid body…
Soon I realized…as an lesser creature should do…!!!…
My body was a piece of flesh…how can I refute the gaze of a beast…and make them enrage…
They are the masters…of the home, the world and also of the mass of the fair sex…where I am just a part of the clan where I represent the darkness…

The first night I bled like hell…awful malady of wounded places…blood was oozing from the scratches that were made…and numbed my senses with pain…
I again started thinking…and realized it as necessary…the stored toxic in my body…needed a path to flow…
The time might come one day…when the pain will be no more…and I shall be born a fresh new bud…in the garden of my Lord…
Then came the next night…then the next…and it went on and on and on…breaking all the fantasies a life can afford with a potent blow…
By that time I had already realize…the way the things go…The debris I gather every night…is the burden of the world…the filth of paradise…which stops men to reach there…once they are liberated…they might find the path of eternity…
I was the reason once those men did fall…and now it’s my turn to restore them all…
So…here I am…taking all the blame…the burden one might say…
A long term fights with what is called life…apparently in a vulnerable way… “

That’s all that she did say…the smell was vanishing…or may be I was getting familiar to the odor…she was not moved for a single second…nor did her eyelashes shiver…who she was…where did she come from was left unknown….might be forever…